Monday, March 31, 2014
One more day!
One day till surgery!! I'm am sooooo ready get on with it. As with jumping horses, you don't look at the fence as you approach, you look beyond (implying you will land where you look), so I'm looking beyond to healing, a gradual resumption of training, and eventual racing.
Fortunately I kept pretty focused all last week with work and life and a nice steady stream of interesting projects for the tremendous clients, coaches, and athletes of the fortyninegroup. I still sometimes can't believe this is really my job. I worked ahead because I don't plan to have access to my computer until I am home again. That will be weird! I'm trying to think what is the longest I have gone without my beloved laptop? Maybe a day or two. My iPhone will have to do.
Friday morning I did the pre-op phone call where they ask a million questions about whether you have had this or that. It pretty much went like this..."no, no, no, never (laugh), no, no, no, lord NO, no, no, oh no, no, yeah a glass of wine some nights, no, no, no...multivitamin, D3...no, no, no, nope."
Later that day I went to the gym to burn off the nerves and hit the treadmill for an appropriately dysfunctional final "run." Any time I find myself feeling nervous about what is ahead, I just think about how much MORE nervous I would be if I was trying to race like this. I'm grateful to have the chance to try to fix it, I really am.
Like most weekends, the kids had some friends (and their laptops, lol) over. As I looked around I seriously debated taking the bike off the trainer to eliminate that temptation over the next few weeks. I decided it was more important and reassuring to keep it in place. It's my indoor kinetic sculpture garden!
I had big plans to bike both days this weekend but the weather had other plans with rain/winds Saturday and snow/cold temps/wind Sunday. The gloom of Saturday pretty much took care of the last of my workout motivation and by the time the sun popped out Sunday I was too far gone. (of course this week while I'm stuck inside it's supposed to be sunny and in the 70s) My friend Bryan suggested I should be looking at it as a "taper" anyway. I substituted in a PJ-wearing movie-marathon on Saturday. I said I was in training for laying around. Very lazy.
Laziness fuels more laziness. This scares me. I know recovery is not laziness...but I think every addicted endurance athlete worries that their lazy self lurks just beneath the active one. OK, I am not THAT worried. Just a little.
Along with the threat of chronic laziness, lots of other what-if's have popped into my head. You can't really help it. So when they do, I just recognize the futility in that type of thinking and get busy doing something else. Like shave the ancient kitty's matted belly fur and give her a bath.
So yeah, I am ready. Work is in good order, the family is in good order, even the pets are in good order. I look forward to turning things over tomorrow to vascular surgeon (and cyclist) Dr. Davidson.
I leave you with this. I love this: